Are you boring?
Have you ever been told you’re boring? No fun? Downright dull?
In a poll of 2,000 Americans, 65 percent of people expressed concern that they are boring.
If you think that you are an appealing topic of conversation, think again.
The number one reason people find others boring is that they tend to talk about themselves too much. Also high on the list – having no sense of humor, frequent complaining, constant phone checking and telling the same stories over and over.
Nearly half of the poll respondents stated that they don’t have compelling stories to share in casual conversation.
If you think you need to beef up your communication skills, consider this advice from Marie Mauter, a licensed clinical social worker and employee assistance program counselor at Advocate Good Shepherd Hospital in Barrington, Ill.
“Find a rhythm between talking and listening,” she says. “Give someone a compliment and tie it to a question. Ask open-ended questions to encourage the other person to share more.”
Mauter also offers these tips:
- Be present. Pay attention to other people’s body language. Lean forward when listening and make eye contact.
- Show interest in what the other person is saying. Think about how you might connect or contribute valuable information.
- Be spontaneous and have fun when you are talking. If you are enjoying the moment, so will others around you.
- If you are telling a story, make it concise and have a lesson or point.
- Step out of your comfort zone. Hearing and inquiring about new things can help boost your self-confidence and give you new things to talk about.
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About the Author
health enews staff is a group of experienced writers from our Advocate Health Care and Aurora Health Care sites, which also includes freelance or intern writers.
My mother has rather low self-esteem and hates talking about herself. She’s learned to deal with that by keeping the focus on the person she is talking to. Consequently, she has become a fabulous listener. People love talking to her. No one thinks she’s “boring”.